Dragonfly By Night

I Have a Confession to Make…

27 Nov 2011 2 Comments

by dragonflybynight in Appalachian Culture, My Journey, Pets, Politics Tags: attorney, bank of america, bankruptcy, banks, basset hound, beagle, confession, debt, dog, economy, education, family, finances, foreclosyre, friend, homes, houses, job search, Kentucky, money, poverty, president obama, rural, secret, stockmarket, unemployment, welfare

I have a secret that I have been hiding for 6 months.  It’s painful, embarassing, and there’s absolutely nothing left that I can do to change it.  I am losing my home.  Bank of America has started foreclosure proceeding on my home.  I have recieved my court summons and I have to have my stuff out this week.  I am 30 years old…I have a Master’s degree…I have worked hard my entire life…I always have more than one job, at least until this year…I am not lazy, on welfare, or any of the other judgements that people make…I am 1 of 4 million Americans that are currently losing their homes…I am the 99%.

I bought my very first home in 2006 just before the housing market surprised us all and plummeted.  I paid my bills consistently and made major improvements on my home.  I became unemployed on May 1, 2011 and the very next day I recieved a notice from Bank of America that my mortgage was going to increase $100 per month due to my variable interest rate loan.  This was distressing news but I didn’t panic, I just began a feverish job search. I live in rural KY where there are few job opportunities when the economy is strong, so now things are impossible.   After several months with no luck and not making my payment, I contacted Bank of America to look at my options.  It turns out that despite President Obama’s many efforts to provide homeowner’s with assistance and to decrease the number of foreclosures, banks are not required to offer these programs.  Bank of America said that they could decrease my payment and I could “apply” for their assistance program.  I read reviews online and made some phone calls and EVERYONE I talked to that had applied for this program accepted the decrease in payments only to be informed 6 – 18 months later that they did not meet the eligibility requirements and that the balance was due on their account.  If these folks could not come up with the balance, which consisted of the discounted amount of their monthly mortgage for the past 6 -18 months plus late fees, many had to foreclose anyway!!!  This is tragic since foreclosure does not guarantee the homeowner won’t owe money – it only means that they may owe less.  If they can’t get out of the house what the homeowner owes, the homeowner still has to pay the difference.  With all of this information floating around in my brain, I gave the situation careful consideration and decided my best option is to file for bankruptcy and give up my home.  I have always had excellent credit but a foreclosure would ruin it anyway so I might as well make certain that, if I can’t save my home, at least I won’t owe Bank of America a debt.

I visited an attorney to learn that filing for bankruptcy will cost a whopping $1200 that I do not have.  So, I focused on finding a job (anything…at this point I will work fast food or retail) to fund my bankruptcy.  I had several garage/yard sales getting rid of furniture and other belongings that I may not have room for any longer and simultaneously making a little money to feed myself and my loveable Beagle/Basset, Sally (see below).  I also have a shop on Etsy that has helped make ends meet and for that I am so thankful.  I am most thankful that I have a friend who let me and Sally move into the upstairs of her home so that we would not have to move in with my parents who live 3 hours away.  I have not lived with my parents since leaving for college at 18, so I can’t explain to you, Gentle Reader, the difficulties that would have accompanied such a decision.  My parents no doubt would have made a place for me but it would have been a shameful event for all concerned.  Where I am from, filing for bankruptcy and losing your home are very shameful things.

Through this experience I am learning much.  I am learning more about what is REALLY important to me….less stuff makes room for more experiences…only true friends make room for you in their homes and their lives…there is no shame when you know you have worked hard and tried your best…good doesn’t always triumph over evil…change is my responsibility as much as anyone else’s… and, finally, life is what I make of it.  I can feel sorry for my misfortune or I can get up, be thankful for all I still have, and keep fighting.  I always wanted a Ph.D. so perhaps this is my chance to go after it.  There is nothing holding me here now so I have no excuses.  Whew!  I feel a little better.  Afterall, secrets can be toxic.

Sally Belle, my happy girl!